Die

*sigh*...

This school year just needs to end. Like.... Really. Except for the fact that I am failing Math. And the fact that I have a D in English. I'm hoping I can get my grade up more. I am not thinking I can pass Math. But I would really like to, since I despise Math with a burning, fiery passion and DO NOT want to take it again. At all.

But I am going to stop complaining about that. Or at least I am really going to try. Sorry. Just try to ignore it.

Soooo..... I'm not exactly sure what to talk about now. I don't remember what my dream was from last night. I think it was a good one, though. At least I didn't wake up feeling terrible, like I do after a bad dream. That could just mean I didn't have one, though. I don't know.

Abby's music is rubbing off on me. I am getting depressed (she is listening to a song called "betrayal" by Apocalyptica). I don't really want to talk to anyone at the moment, but I probably will have to sometime soon. I can feel myself getting into one of my silent moods. I seem to be getting into those a lot lately. Hmmmm.... Maybe I am depressed. I don't really know.

I am starting to really hate life at the moment. Well, mostly just the fact that every time I see my parents they are yelling at me to do my homework and talk to my teachers and do everything right then. They don't seem to understand that it isn't that simple. It just isn't. I can't do everything at once, and they expect me to. I don't really think I am going to be able to pass Math, and I am doing all that I can to try to make it happen anyway, but this is how our conversations have gone for the past few weeks: "Why aren't you doing this?" "I already did everything I know how to do." "Well, how much didn't you do?" "Everything I didn't know how..." "Well, you need to learn from the book." "I can't. I don't understand it at all." "Well, you are going to have to. That is how I learned Math all through school." "I think they made them differently back then." "School hasn't changed that much from when I was in school thirty years ago." (Silence on my part, but really thinking, "You don't even know what school is like now.") "You don't seem to care that you aren't going to pass, but we are trying to help you." (again, silence, but thinking, "Of course I care. There is just nothing I can do to force my teachers to give me passing grades.") "Well, aren't you going to do something?" "I am doing it my own way, I know what I am doing. (Thinking, "I understand every part of my situation, you don't even know half of it.")" "Well, we tried your way; it didn't work." (Silence, but thinking, "No we didn't. We partially mixed my way and yours. That definitely didn't work.")

This was about the time that I walk away, parents yelling after me.

Sorry, I was going to stop complaining. I am starting to wonder if that is possible for me. Hopefully this stuff will all go away when school ends. Actually, probably not completely, but that would be nice. At least it will lessen quite a bit. Hopefully.

That was about the time

*sizzle drip drip melting brain*

Math is officially scalding my brain. I have a bunch of homework that is late and that I need to turn in. Math is foremost among these. I spent about 5 hours on Saturday doing it, and I didn't even get close to finishing. I got through all five or six assignments, but I had no idea how to do about 50-60% of the problems on them, hence, 50-60% didn't get done. All I am going to say is that I love the back of the book. A lot. Yesterday I spent about an hour and a half with my brother-in-law, Doug, finishing some problems. We got one and a half assignments done. Joy.

I swear though, he can read Math. My dad keeps telling me I can learn from the book, but no. I know this is impossible. But whenever Doug didn't know how to do the problem, he just flipped straight to the page he needed and pointed to an example that I never would have found, and was then able to actually understand what the book was trying to say. I can never do that. The book, instead of just saying, "The red line on the graph" says things like, "The inverse side of the radius of a circle" and whatnot. It is not cool at all.

I have to stay after for Math today, and tomorrow, and the whole week, probably, unless I get everything turned in. Hmmm....

Ummm..... Nemo?

So. Yesterday I was honestly trying to do my homework. I really was. It was just... I was tired. It didn't work. I fell asleep for a few hours. While I was sleeping, I had an odd dream. I suppose I will put it on my blog, just because. Probably no one is reading this anyway.

In my dream, I was in this odd place with a bunch of people I know getting briefed for the thing we were going to do. I'm not sure what It was. Anyways, we split into teams of about 10 or so people and started doing some random stuff. Like, we would go through all these random decrepit buildings and have to go through weird obstacles. Then we would get past them to these random shacks that had a piano in each corner. Sometimes we had to play it, sometimes the pianos took us to odd places like scenes from movies, unlikely places and other strange places.

jnuyd <-- love, Abby.

Well, anyways. So, one of the scenes I remember is going into Finding Nemo and going through some places in there. For some reason, my friend and I were talking about this huge inside joke we have in front of everyone as we were trying to make it through the trench thing in it and that one school of fish was following us and trying to give us directions. It was odd. And this other guy was trying and failing to make sense of our joke and it was kind of awkward because people jump t0 conclusions about that joke.

In another shack, we were put on a plane and it would only fly if someone were playing the piano. But it would only fly if they were being "sincere" about it. They didn't necessarily need to be good, but if they just played nothing, the plane would start to descend. If you stopped, the plane would fall. Of course, I was the only one who could play the piano. So I wished for hymnbook so I could play since I don't have that many songs memorized other than the classic: Mary Had a Little Lamb. Hmmm...

Well, as you can tell, this is what I dream about. I didn't tell you everything, but I really don't think you want to know.

Mercury

So, last nightI had this freakish dream. I don't remember it all, but here is part of it, just because I can't think of what else to write about. You non-existent readers out there are probably tired of hearing me whine about my grades.
The first thing I remember of the dream was sitting in this weird yellow armchair on the grass in my backyard while my mom did some yardwork on the other side of the yard. I kept getting mad because all these ants kept crawling up the side of my chair and coming towards me. I was killing all the ones I could find, but more and more just kept coming. I was suddenly afraid that they would come from the other side, the side that I was sitting on (I was sitting on the arm of the chair), so I quickly stood up. For some reason, none of them had come from that side. By this time, there were a ton of ants all over the other armrest.
I stood up again and picked up the chair, shaking it to get all the ants off as I moved it onto the cement. I was really mad that they kept coming for me. My mom was just standing there looking at me and giving me weird looks; probably because I was holding this yellow armchair and shaking it and looking furious.
Well, I finally set the chair down on the cement not too far from the grass. I then remember seeing a squad of ants led by a red ant coming towards my chair. I was irritated that they kept coming after me! Anyway, I killed all the ones that came up my chair, then I finally don't even remember what I did next.
I think the dream shifted then, because the next thing I remember is being with some dark, mysterious guy who's face I could never see, even though I don't think he was wearing a mask or anything. We had to use Mercury to do some sort of covert mission, I don't remember what, but I think it might have had something to do with cars and balloons. Don't ask me.
After we finished doing whatever we had been doing, we went back to my garage to put the Mercury away, but he warned me not to put it too close to the Tritium or the Aluminum. It could catch fire if the Tritium exploded from as far as 20 feet away. I don't remember why I couldn't put it witht the Aluminum. Then I heard this horrible beeping and I freaked out for a second before I realized it was my alarm.
Well, that was my weird dream. I know, it probably doesn't make sense. Oh, well.

Cheese Log

I am sooo tired..... And I have lots of homework.... And I haven't done much of it.... And I am really stupid for procrastinating all of it.

Tomorrow I need to turn in a ton of stuff for English. I am not at all excited to do this.

Tomorrow I also have a few things for Chemistry that I need to get done. But not as much, luckily.

On Friday I have my Mastery Points for Spanish due, but I don't have that class on Friday, so I would like to get it done today and turn it in tomorrow. It is worth 250 points. Bleh.

I also have another project for Spanish due tomorrow that I need my friend to do. So this time it is not only me. It feels nice to finally be able to blame someone else for part of it. But, I admit, it is partially my fault.

I am soooo ready for summer.

Weekends Are Delicious

This weekend was pretty much the awesomest weekend I have had in a long time. It was my birthday on Friday, so of course that was a good day, and then the next day I had my birthday party.

For my birthday party, we first went laser tagging. It was amazing! First we were put with this big group of guys. two of them were put on our team, and we went against the rest. One of the guys on our team got first place, and we won the game. It was intense, and I had a lot of fun. Even though I got 9th place. Oh, well.

But the second game was a little more stupid. We were put with some other people from Timp, and we heard them say in low voice, "Oh, they're just Sophomores. This is going to be stupid." Whenever we would talk to them at all, they would completely ignore us, except for one girl which seemed to actually have a soul. She was nice.

Throughout the game, there were many instances of cheating by these people. Holding their hands in front of our guns while they shot us, pinning us in a corner and shooting us repeatedly until we needed to recharge, and guarding our charger so we couldn't charge. Among other things. I'm sorry to say that these people are here at my school, making it worse.

Even with all the cheating, I got 2nd place this time. I would have gotten first, except for that one guy that kept trapping me and killing me over and over. I am just happy to say I had a good time.

Then we went back to my house, opened presents and ate cake and ice cream. It was cool. Then we went outside and were all in a super weird mood. Two of my friends ran away down the street, and one of my friends was like, "Let's go. We have to hunt them down." The next ten minutes involved sprinting after one of my friends halfway down the block in the rain, and when I finally caught her, we skipped for a while. This didn't last long, since she was barefoot, so we walked the rest of the way around the block as if we hadn't just been in a high speed chase. Then we got back, sat in a tree for a while, then we played with a ball for a while.

This weekend was awesome. The only problem is: Homework. I am now back at school, super sore from laser tagging, tired from staying up late, and hating homework SOOOOO much. Well, I guess that is just too bad for me.